Author Archives: John

Masks of Fear 5: Tribal Masks

Posted on August 12, 2020 by John

“Tribalism is a product of fear, and fear is the dominant emotion of any person, culture or society that rejects man’s power of survival: reason.” – Ayn Rand Tribalism is the state of being organized by, or advocating for, tribes. … Continue reading →

Posted in Coping with Sadness, Cultivating Character, Dealing with Fear, Dealing with Shame, Decision-Making, Get Rid of Anxiety, How to Be Happier, How to Stop Worrying, Relationships, Self Esteem | Leave a comment

Masks of Fear 4: Mask-ulinity

Posted on August 2, 2020 by John

You should refuse to wear a “face condom”. And, it’s easy to explain because you can use the same lame excuses: “I’m too big” – you can’t find a mask big enough to cover your enormous, chiseled, masculine jaw. “I’m … Continue reading →

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Masks of Fear 3: Implausible Denial

Posted on July 28, 2020 by John

When faced with shocking or emotionally painful information, one of the most common reflexive responses is “no” – or “you’re kidding me”. It’s a way of stepping back from the initial impact. This response (called “denial”) is the first of … Continue reading →

Posted in Anger Management, Coping with Sadness, Cultivating Character, Dealing with Fear, Dealing with Shame, Decision-Making, Get Rid of Anxiety, How to Be Happier, How to Stop Worrying, Procrastination, Relationships, Self Esteem, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Masks of Fear 2: FOF

Posted on July 25, 2020 by John

If seeing other people in masks brings anxious (or angry) feelings, you may be having a very normal human reaction to loss of FOF signals. To understand and find relief, keep reading. What’s FOF? During WW2, when RADAR was developed, … Continue reading →

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Masks of Fear 1: Suffocating Panic

Posted on June 30, 2020 by John

If wearing a mask makes you feel short of breath or light-headed, it’s NOT because it’s “reducing your oxygen” or because it’s “trapping the CO2”. (Masks don’t actually do those things.) The symptoms are most probably due to a panic … Continue reading →

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Stop it and Get a Life

Posted on June 9, 2020 by John

Stop it. Please. I’m writing to ask you to STOP IT. Please. You know who you are, posting announcements from Facebook applications with titles like: “Which fairy are you?” “Which day of the week are you?” “Which beer are you?” … Continue reading →

Posted in Dealing with Shame, Get Rid of Anxiety, How to Be Happier, How to Stop Worrying, Self Esteem, Uncategorized | Comments Off on Stop it and Get a Life

Victim Status – according to Brodsky

Posted on June 2, 2020 by John

I write a good bit about victim status, seeking it, the utility of it – and the price. I just came across this fragment of a commencement speech by Joseph Brodsky, from 1988, where he speaks eloquently and directly about … Continue reading →

Posted in Anger Management, Bully Blog, Coping with Sadness, Cultivating Character, Dealing with Fear, Dealing with Shame, Get Rid of Anxiety, How to Be Happier, Relationships, Self Esteem, Uncategorized | Comments Off on Victim Status – according to Brodsky

Clean Off the Guilt

Posted on May 24, 2020 by John

Nobody is eager to do the job of cleaning a stinking mess off their shoe, but the alternative is to walk around smelling like that – and tracking it everywhere you go. And, whether you’re spending time “isolated together” with … Continue reading →

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Landmarks of the Self

Posted on May 10, 2020 by John

People construct and experience their identity – their place in the world – largely based on their interactions with others. Disruption of one’s social interactions can lead people to lose sight of the landmarks they have chosen to navigate their … Continue reading →

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Motivational Minute: Utilization Principle

Posted on March 20, 2020 by John

This is March 20, 2020, and stress over the COVID-19 virus is beginning to crescendo for many people. They’re trying to concentrate, to do work from home or create something – or to home-school their kids – and the constant … Continue reading →

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