Category Archives: Anger Management

Managing anger – yours, theirs, and anyone’s

Masks of Fear 3: Implausible Denial

When faced with shocking or emotionally painful information, one of the most common reflexive responses is “no” – or “you’re kidding me”. It’s a way of stepping back from the initial impact. This response (called “denial”) is the first of … Continue reading

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Masks of Fear 1: Suffocating Panic

If wearing a mask makes you feel short of breath or light-headed, it’s NOT because it’s “reducing your oxygen” or because it’s “trapping the CO2”. (Masks don’t actually do those things.) The symptoms are most probably due to a panic … Continue reading

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Victim Status – according to Brodsky

I write a good bit about victim status, seeking it, the utility of it – and the price. I just came across this fragment of a commencement speech by Joseph Brodsky, from 1988, where he speaks eloquently and directly about … Continue reading

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Landmarks of the Self

People construct and experience their identity – their place in the world – largely based on their interactions with others. Disruption of one’s social interactions can lead people to lose sight of the landmarks they have chosen to navigate their … Continue reading

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Why Teachers Become Bullies

Last time, I talked about additive strategies and subtractive strategies, and how insecurity in social currency invites people to take “the low road” to preserving or gaining status. This time, I’m going to provide an example of how that “low … Continue reading

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Malls Model Authoritarianism

Capitalism and Social Metrics: On a recent paragliding trip to Mexico, I watched the social interactions of boys who follow pilots to help carry and pack-up equipment. In terms of an after school job, they have it better than I … Continue reading

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Stop Group Bullying (2)

Last time, I revealed how humans have intuitive, unconscious, evolved awareness that being mean can be socially profitable. That (unconscious) awareness of this is not lost on our little darlings. And, if we want to stop group bullying we’re going … Continue reading

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Understand Bullying: Angry Kids

Welcome (back?) to Understanding Bullying. This installment is about Angry Kids – or really about the function of anger and the role it plays in the bullying dynamic. The change you want to see is waiting – for you to … Continue reading

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