Category Archives: Dealing with Shame

Masks of Fear 4: Mask-ulinity

You should refuse to wear a “face condom”. And, it’s easy to explain because you can use the same lame excuses: “I’m too big” – you can’t find a mask big enough to cover your enormous, chiseled, masculine jaw. “I’m … Continue reading

Posted in Cultivating Character, Dealing with Fear, Dealing with Shame, Decision-Making, How to Be Happier, Self Esteem | Leave a comment

Masks of Fear 3: Implausible Denial

When faced with shocking or emotionally painful information, one of the most common reflexive responses is “no” – or “you’re kidding me”. It’s a way of stepping back from the initial impact. This response (called “denial”) is the first of … Continue reading

Posted in Anger Management, Coping with Sadness, Cultivating Character, Dealing with Fear, Dealing with Shame, Decision-Making, Get Rid of Anxiety, How to Be Happier, How to Stop Worrying, Procrastination, Relationships, Self Esteem, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Stop it and Get a Life

Stop it. Please. I’m writing to ask you to STOP IT. Please. You know who you are, posting announcements from Facebook applications with titles like: “Which fairy are you?” “Which day of the week are you?” “Which beer are you?” … Continue reading

Posted in Dealing with Shame, Get Rid of Anxiety, How to Be Happier, How to Stop Worrying, Self Esteem, Uncategorized | Comments Off on Stop it and Get a Life

Victim Status – according to Brodsky

I write a good bit about victim status, seeking it, the utility of it – and the price. I just came across this fragment of a commencement speech by Joseph Brodsky, from 1988, where he speaks eloquently and directly about … Continue reading

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Clean Off the Guilt

Nobody is eager to do the job of cleaning a stinking mess off their shoe, but the alternative is to walk around smelling like that – and tracking it everywhere you go. And, whether you’re spending time “isolated together” with … Continue reading

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Stop Group Bullying (2)

Last time, I revealed how humans have intuitive, unconscious, evolved awareness that being mean can be socially profitable. That (unconscious) awareness of this is not lost on our little darlings. And, if we want to stop group bullying we’re going … Continue reading

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Understand Bullying: Overcoming Shame

Welcome (back?) to Understand Bullying – Overcoming Shame. Last time, I promised to reveal how you can protect your children against the most destructive dangers of shame and how to challenge shame that may exist. Shame is the most potent … Continue reading

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Understand Bullying: The Role of Shame

Welcome (back?) to Understand Bullying – the role of Shame, which is the most potent and concerning emotion related to bullying. In the next installment I promised to reveal how Shame interacts with some of the other emotions; how it … Continue reading

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